3. The Great Depression

Wow, the rest of the world must look like shit!

Okay, “Great Depression.” First of all, what makes you so fucking “Great” in the first place? 25% unemployment? 89% drop in stock values? A 17 per 100,000 person suicide rate (whereas today’s rate is 17 per 100,000…oh boy, we’re fucked)? Aren’t we fucking special. [...]

5. Rich people.

Alright you latte-drinking, homeless-people killing, bathe more than once a week, rich douchebags. It’s time you man up to your share of the problem. You have the one commodity every single person needs: money. When you go door to door with a sack of cash offering low-interest (at the time) loans to people [...]

My 10th birthday party. Everyone left becaues I ate all 13 cakes…

In case you don’t know, I’m a twenty-something with no job and am currently out of school. I have ‘currently’ been such a person for about, say, a year. I play online games, and although I do not live with my mom DIRECTLY, I do [...]

Boy, there are so many reasons that they are difficult to ennumerate. Here’s a summary outlining the fundamentals of the problem:

1. Old people have the physical and mental capacities of a new-born baby. On top of that, they are legally allowed to drive. You do the math.

Still not convinced? Here are the horrific results:

2. Old [...]

Trees. Nature’s solution to cold, dark and damp caves whose only comfort consists of using bat shit as pillows. But there is something sinister at work here. They have become “self-aware.” With their ability to live hundreds of years, these cunning masters of stationary espionage have concocted a way in which to “infect” humans with [...]